A Dream that’s Real

Sleeping i am…not having a care in the world, and the phone rings…

I pick it up…and to my suprise it’s him…her…all of them…asking questions, wondering how the moon looks on this particular night. I get dressed in black, so that i can wear all of my sins on my sleeves, my chest, back, basically everywhere you can see. in the night we roamed living the night life….nocturnal, active by night. we stay out 2 see the moon go down and the sun come up. what a sight, as we sit on the mountain top while we watch the peasants, untouchables, or whatevv you wana call ‘em….

I hear…a phone ring…it was a dream…

…ALL of it?!?! or none…all i know now is that ”THEY” are outside waiting…

Pharrell on TYRA show with Slim Thug

It was the BAR-B-Q wings that made her run…LMAO!

Starts w/ Kissin’ Ears huh?

Chapter 13: Graduation

The first thing i need to say is that I LOVE ALL OF YOU! im sorry for everything. It was my addiction.LoL. i was a lost sole. i still am but slowly and surely i will find it again. all i want is to go back to my world… everyone has their own world….ya’no, were everything is perfect and nothing ever goes wrong. you guys were all i ever needed, shadowing myself behind lies, truths, and all of the above. it takes time for people to become real with themselves. i can still remember that day…the guys, on the left dressed in green and the beautiful women to my right dressed in that stunning gold. i remember when i got to that point were everything after seemed irrelevant. i remember when we would count the days down until it was here. waiting from when we hit 1st grade to that senior year that will never be forgotten. i take that trip everyday in mind. i remember tears…tears of happiness, uncertainty, and all that other good stuff. and now…yes i cry..i cry as i write this. i cry as i think about all of you. i cry for all your problems that i cant help you solve. i cry for the problems in me that scream-       …”HELP! HELP!”

if i new what i new now i would go back in time and warn them. I’d tell them to hold on…hold on to each other because after this event things will never be the same. you guys will part ways…friendships will die, relationships will be severed and the family that you once new will grow apart. i have proof i tell ya! PROOF! proof that everything dies. i can show you what will happen. you will “damage each other” as she once said. right now i can’t help myself…it’s a sickness. i have the cure within my reach but these chains of love, compassion, and affection keep me locked down. must i break these chains??? they are the only thing that keep me sane. the only thing that keeps me safe. but…there is something…a dark shadowy figure that lurks over there in the distance. the feeling by seeing it compels me to do better. i later realize it is a women. a women that i only see in my dreams…

and she is HOPE.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The last smile HOPE ever saw…

***New*** Eric Benét- You’re The Only One

A great R&B song forreal…they dont make it like this anymore…enjoy!

Chapter 12: Your addiction, the blade ruNN

Run! Run! Run! dont look back at what’s chasing you, for i have seen what they do if they were to catch you. It all starts with the addiction…not just any addiction but an addiciton that is solely created for you. At first you love it, love it so much that you’ll do anything for it. Everyone that you come in contact with sees that your a new person because of your new found addiction. you live a life you never thought possible before the affliction. Everywhere you go things seem to get better, you not only make it better for yourself but you make everyone around you, until…they ask…

“what is making me feel this way…?”

Now it sets in…your on a quest to find your addiction. the very thought of cutting out everyone in your life for the addiction consumes you and causes you to do so. Funny…i recently told a couple people this story and at first they immediately think…”omg this guy is some kinda fien” LoL was all i could do when they later could relate it to their own lifes! one told me he felt that way about his mom, one told me she felt that way about her purses, one told me he felt that way about his car, one told me she felt that way about herself.

At this point it seems like everyone around you has found their long awaited addiction and your stuck there with nowhere to go, nothing to do, no one to talk to…is that because your somehow “different” or “special”…NO…it just means the addiction hasnt found you…yet. It is only when the mear thought of the adiction causes you to be startled in a deep sleep, until you wake up and realize that your alone and no one is there. One day you find yourself sitting at your computer to talking to an old friend and before you know it you find yourself asking…

“how come i stop talking to him/her..?”

and then it hits you…you grew apart, niether of you had time for each other and slowly you faded out of each others memories. so guys decide to azuzumen [ if you havent seen Eurotrip then you not gona get that one] but you guys meet it’s like old times..ya’ check out a movie, hit up some laser tag with a few friends, go to a couple cars shows, and just all around have fun because you enjoy each other’s company. You find yourself now living a live you never imagined.

…and there it is…the blade ruNNers have consumed you, just that quick tha life you thought was perfect has just been an addiction that holds you tighter and tighter as each second, minute, hour, and day go bye.

“what an addiction, WHAT A RUSH..!”

Chapter 11: Provoke

Ever feel like theres an answer for everything even when at times it seeems there is no answer…? Answers can be found everywhere you look. When your with a group of friends…[do something] just watch how they move, watch how they act, watch what happens…[as if your not there] what does it look like…? When your driving in your car…look around…[but make sure you pay attention to the road, we would'nt want you to crash.LoL.] watch the scene, watch the sky, watch the way the cars form around you as you get to your destination…whatch what happens…? When your at a party…[and your getting shit-faced.LoL.] well you wont be able to do much cause your pretty much shit-faced….LLs. [For you...LoL] when your smokin’ watch the way the blunt burnes, watch the way the smoke forms as it leaves the “rose,” watch the way it makes you look at everything…[for all of those 20 minutes.LoL.] whatch what happens…When your waking up in the morning to get dressed look at how you look at your clothes, what you decide to put on, what message you send, and  what colors, styles, fabrics you use when you put that particular outfit on…watch what happens. Like i mentiond answers can be found everywhere even when it seems like there isn’t one…

…All you gotta do is PROVOKE ‘EM.

John Mayer – I don’t Trust Myself with Loving You

Kanye West ATTACKS and gets ARRESTED! with the link to the VIDEO!

TMZ is reporting that Kanye West was arrested today in L.A. for assaulting a paparazzi who was taking his picture. One of TMZ’s ever-present cameramen was in the vicinity, and he started rolling before being assaulted by Kanye’s bodyguard. Here’s what he says went down:

 

Erik says he was at Terminal 4 (American Airlines) when he noticed a still photog taking several pictures of Kanye West. Erik says West rushed the photog and grabbed his camera. A struggle ensued and the still guy was screaming, “Police, help!” Erik says Kanye then took the still camera and threw it on the ground, breaking it into pieces.

 

Erik then went over to Kanye, his camera rolling, when Kanye’s bodyguard walked up to him, realized Erik was taping, and said, “Give me the camera, give me the camera.” Erik responded that he had a press pass and had a right to shoot. The assistant then grabbed the camera, ripped off the mic and viewfinder and smashed it to the ground.

 

Erik says Kanye then tried to leave to board his plane, but cops stopped him before he got to security. The cops then interviewed Erik, the still photog, Kanye and his assistant.TMZ claim that Kanye will be charged with vandalism.

Link for video:  http://www.tmz.com/tmz_main_video?titleid=1788889337

Blu – NeverBeAnotherMe

Link for song: http://www.zshare.net/audio/18531806313d6c82/